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What Is Love?

Love is a feeling. Feelings are personal. They are not the same for everyone. Someone does something and one person gets angry and another person does not. Why? Because feelings are personal. They are triggered by our thoughts. When something happens, one person is thinking one thing and another person is thinking something else so they don't feel the same thing about the same event and therefore don't react the same to the same event.

Love is not the same for everyone. Our feelings are triggered by our thoughts and our thoughts are controlled by our beliefs and our beliefs are created by what happened to us when we were children. Not everyone had the same experiences as a child so not everyone has the same beliefs, the same thoughts or the same emotional response to situations. What makes one person feel loved, has no effect on someone else.Love is a feeling. Feelings are personal. They are not the same for everyone. Someone does something and one person gets angry and another person does not. Why? Because feelings are personal. They are triggered by our thoughts. When something happens, one person is thinking one thing and another person is thinking something else so they don't feel the same thing about the same event and therefore don't react the same to the same event.

Love is not the same for everyone. Our feelings are triggered by our thoughts and our thoughts are controlled by our beliefs and our beliefs are created by what happened to us when we were children. Not everyone had the same experiences as a child so not everyone has the same beliefs, the same thoughts or the same emotional response to situations. What makes one person feel loved, has no effect on someone else.

Some people are happy being told that they are loved. Someone just has to tell them they love them and that's enough for them. For example, the man who beats his wife every time she does something he doesn't like actually does love his wife. This is hard for people to believe because to them, beating someone up means you don't love them. But he does love his wife. Love for him is not the same as it is for us. We expect everyone to think the way we do, react the way we do and have the same emotional response to things in the same way that we do but this is not the case. His wife doesn't like that he beats her up but for her just being told he loves her means he loves her despite what else he does to her.

When someone says I love you what does it mean exactly? We know what it should mean because we have our own personal beliefs about love but we never really stop to think that it may not mean the same thing for other people. It is important to know what love is for other people and not assume that our version of love is the same as theirs. Each person has a version of love in their heads based on their beliefs.

Sometimes even though someone tells you they love you, you don't feel loved. You feel miserable. It means they see love one way and you see it a different way. A woman will ask, “If my boyfriend loves me why does he cheat?” Well, her version of love means you don't cheat on people you love. In her boyfriend's head though it is okay to cheat because when he cheats, it's just sex and sex isn't love so he can cheat and still love his girlfriend. They have different beliefs about love which causes friction in their relationship.

Some people view sex as love. If their lover won't have sex with them whenever they want to have sex then they think the other person doesn't love them. Meanwhile their lover thinks, “this person is sex crazy”. Some people need to be given gifts in a relationship to feel loved. Meanwhile their lover thinks, “all this person cares about is money.”

Sometimes parents will get frustrated because they tell their kids they love them but the child is miserable and doesn't believe that the parent loves them. Why? Because the parent thinks, I put a roof over your head, I feed you, I clothed you. All of that means I love you. But the child thinks, who cares. We could live in a shack, I could be naked and hungry and I wouldn't care as long as you spent some time with me because that is what I need to feel loved.

Love is a feeling and feelings are triggered by our thoughts which are triggered by our beliefs. This means love is not the same for everyone. In order for a relationship to work both people have to know what they need in order to feel loved and the other person has to be willing to do whatever that thing is.


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